in-laws, miraculous post-its and coming home again

i'm still on california time, and very wired due to my 4th diet coke today. i can't even believe i am admitting to even drinking diet coke, much less four in one day. this is after years of soapboxing about the dangers of artificial sweeteners and giving up caffeine and sodas for several years.

the only possible explanation is being on an airplane with 2 small children for 6 hours and traveling a total of 12 hours today. i am physically exhausted but happy in my heart. it was a good trip on so many levels. i would have to say a little healing too.

after obsessing over an awful haircut on tuesday and staying up all night getting ready to leave, i was exhausted by wednesday morning. i busted my ass so we could go to a birthday party on wednesday morning at my friend jenna's house. i was so glad i went, jenna has a way of making everyone feel so welcomed. after listening to my hair dilemma, she offered to fix it for me (she's a stylist)- right during her daughter's third birthday party. it was like jesus himself was cutting my hair. i was so overwhelmed by her kindness. i finally felt ready to leave.

after a night at a hotel in norfolk which josiah thought was "beautiful", we were off to the airport. i was hoping we could snag a seat for jack in a not-so-full flight but no such luck. after 45 minutes of a 5 hour flight, i had gone through my entire surprise bag of tricks. i remembered i had one of those post-it flag packs. the kind you use to mark papers or pages in catalogs. the beauty of the little flags is that when you pull one out another pops up. this is a toddler's dream activity. i figured there are only 20 in the pack so this activity would be over real quick. i swear it was like jesus feeding the 5000, the flags just kept popping up. jack was occupied for another half hour, and much to the relief of the man sitting in front of us.

at one point in the last hour of the flight, jorge and i just started tickling both of them like crazy. when they started getting really loud i suggested maybe we should stop when jorge said, "babe, there are worse things in the world than hearing kids laugh." i agreed and kept tickling. both of jorge's sisters greeted us at the airport with smiles bigger than i have ever seen. after much family drama (with jorge's mom) the last few years, we desperately needed a time of bonding and i could just tell it was going to be a good trip.

the days were spent lounging, eating, and of course legoland. it has to be the only theme park i have ever been to that was designed for children under the age of five. we could have spent a year there, even the over priced food was good- somewhat healthy i should add.

i had no real agenda other than hanging out with jorge's family. it felt like family, so many times before i have felt so out of place, not really accepted. it was emotionally exhausting for me and i usually always ended up feeling pissy and controlled. jorge and i are in a whole different place now, we are so bonded, we are our own family. letting go of resentment sets a heart free...somehow i could let go- not analyze every conversation, i just enjoyed their company. i felt proud for them to experience my kids and they enjoyed them. josiah has such a strong sense of family and immediately took to the fact that he had cousins, tia's and tio's. the girls even watched our kids so j and i could sleep all day one day. they were so nurturing and warm, i felt taken care of and loved.

jack wanted nothing to do with lauren (his cousin who is 1 that we met for the first time), i think he is used to being the youngest. she was great, she was unfazed by his dismissing behavior and kept playing while occasionally trying to connect. he finally recognized her presence by the end of the trip. that jackie-boy...

jorge had his panties all in a wad over Fahrenheit 9/11. he went with our 13 year old nephew sean. the movie was sean's pick- i was seriously impressed by his choice. i still have yet to see it but by judging jorge's reaction, i'd have to guess there was plenty in the movie that was causing him to question himself and his beloved president. i was just thrilled to be in the company of a house full of democrats- j was so outnumbered, he didn't know what to do. ;)

so now we are back, broke as a joke and happy to be in our own beds. i need to hibernate in my cave (i.e. purple bedroom) for a few days and then this will complete our great vacation. these are happy days...