my crunchy bubble

ya know there are just some times when you realize you have been living in a bubble. the first time for me was when i left my christian private school and went to college- it wasn't good or bad for me, just different and it wouldn't be until later in my life that i even cared. there have been several more experiences since then that have stretched my thinking and have helped to shape a new way of viewing my life and others. The thing is, these experiences have always seemed to go from conservative to more liberal in nature, not the other way around. It seems in all my recent enlightenment I have created my own crunchy bubble. Oh, i love my bubble, dude, I LOVE IT! i love how free i feel- it's a big bubble you know. i've been hibernating for so long i forgot what the world is like outside my bubble.

i work at a united methodist church in an affluent area of conservative richmond, this is life outside my postmodern, attachment parenting, liberal-loving bubble. i attended a party for a parent of one of the kids in my program last night. in a casual girl conversation about how fancy birth control has become i stated how i still don't have a period because i'm nursing my son. (he’s 18 months) i'm thinking, "how fantastic! - kinda proud of my body has gone this long and that i don't have to deal with pms." it never crossed my mind that my extended nursing would be so controversial. in my world, 18 months is nothing...it literally stopped all conversation dead in it's tracks- very awkward silence. now part of me kind of enjoyed being so shocking (although i was equally as shocked at the reaction), but it really was getting kind of weird so i was a little relieved when the conversation went on to something else. later on in the evening someone cracked a joke that i might be nursing my second grader. i was thrilled for the sarcasm and said, "na, i think i'll wean him when he goes to college." we laughed, and i felt much better.

the funny thing is...i really like these people. i really do, we are so opposite and i still like them. i'm sure you have no idea how good this really is. i could not have left my bubble just two years ago and felt this way. i would have been all pissy and judgemental after a night like that, wondering why i even went to the party in the first place- then I would contemplate whether or not i should keep working in a place that holds such different values than my own. and the drama in my head would continue…i sort of crave it from time to time. this time i felt so peaceful. these women have befriended me, i can tell they really like me but aren’t quite sure what to do with me. i feel so secure in my parenting decisions, i have no need to defend them or even explain…they just are what they are. and my heart is drawn to these parents and their kids. i want to minister to them, to encourage them, to be part of their spiritual journeys. it’s just funny that a girl like me is in a place like that. while i will be happily skipping back to my bubble (seems i traded one for another), i’m finding that maybe just maybe i can take trips outside and discover there is beauty in that very strange world.